My year so far

Well  2016 has already proved to be less than good. DD was flaring from Xmas and all the stress that was associated with that...DP being home for 12 days being a major source of stress for all of us! DS2 being off College for 3 weeks was also exhausting as he gets silly and bored at home. He was also obsessive about getting a screen for his PS2, that 'Santa' got as an extra Xmas pressie, which was beyond hard work! Anyway as a finale to her flare DD had Norovirus so we had a week of vomiting and shitting bile...not fun. She was very poorly indeed and the second night I didn't bother getting undressed as I was under no illusions I'd get any sleep...I didn't...and I also didn't fancy rushing to get dressed if I had to phone for an ambulance! Anyway DD survived and is slowly, very slowly, picking up. Though 2 weeks on she still gets tired very easily and is still suffering with mild depression after being so ill. What a great start to the year!

DP was a total arse when DD was ill...he asked after her ONCE...the night after she was vomiting constantly. Other than that he didn't mention her at all. He and DS2 went round to a friends and DS2 mentioned how ill DD was but DP said nothing...he is such a crap parent and indeed a crap person. How he squares his behaviour up with his highly inflated opinion of his amazingness I do not know but I am sure he does as he still worships himself.

Social Services have FINALLY sorted DS2 being moved over to adult services, about time he will be 18 in 4 months....they have been 'sorting' this for well over a year! Too many departments and committees all wanting to be involved. Anyway I now have a pile of paperwork I have to wade through, including such delights as a 'community connections map'...I despise such crap wording. Its there to make people feel important and clever and its so pathetic. Paperwork for the sake of paperwork always makes my blood boil and this all seems such a waste of time...I have been caring for DS2 for 11 years and now have to wade through a morass of waffy paperwork to get approved to continue doing what I have been doing for years...I think that pretty much defines 'pointless paperwork'. I have sorted most of it and will get the rest done but I resent having to jump through hoops to do a job that no one else wants to do and which no one wants me to stop doing.

DS2 has also had an overly exciting start to the year. He was getting a load of texts and voice mail messages from a couple of the other students at College. We deleted them and blocked the numbers. One in particular was very inappropriate, lots of 'I love you' messages and sexual stuff. As it was over the holidays I didn't email College about it but did tell DS2 to stay away from the people involved. Well obviously he didn't and when one of them offered him the chance to go off and have a snog and grope he was only too happy to go...even though he ostensibly has a girlfriend...he is such a 17 year old boy, all hormones and no brain! Anyway the other student decided after the snog that she was upset and went to complain to a member of staff...they told me but weren't too bothered as it had been mutual. Her parents though decided to go nuclear and phoned the Police...apparently they have done this previously, they must be nutty! As a result DS2 was off College for over a week while it was all  sorted out, not because he was in trouble but to stop him being wrongly accused of anything in future. Unfortunately DS2 didn't see it this way he saw - off College= big punishment= I have done something really bad. He was incredibly stressed and worried he was in trouble with the Police, College would be cross with him, no one would like him when he went back and so on. He was having problems sleeping...he came to see me at 2.30am...he had back ache and stomach ache that were totally caused by the stress. Fortunately he went back to College in time to share a box of sweets to celebrate his 11th anniversary which pleased him and once he saw he wasn't in trouble and everyone still liked him he was fine, but it was very hard while he was off.

Other than that its not been a dreadful January...no snow or ice which is good. No massive stress over money which is unusual in the extreme, but pleasant! We are sorting to get a stair lift for DD as she is finding stairs increasing hard. I mentioned this to my parents...not a good idea. DF was all 'I will give you the money now, I will do ANYTHING to make life easier for DGD'...he has said similar before and then back tracked so I don't trust it, but he feels good saying it. DM  has been stressed in case I do take up the offer as she feels any money should be spent on her and why is anyone paying attention to someone else's illness when they should be focussing on her. I ignore as much as possible and will, eventually, learn to tell them nothing!

I am hoping the year improves but I've no great hopes. I'd love to be proved wrong!

Update: well the year is not improving. The Police decided after DS2 had been back in College and calming down again that he shouldn't be in College until they could get their act together and have a 'meeting'. Given no one has spoken to either me or DS2's Social Worker about the ...decidedly minor...incident I am not sure what the Police are doing and who they think they are protecting. God they make Social Service look efficient! To make it worse the person (not) dealing with the situation issued her orders about DS2 not being in College then went off work for 4 days! I am soo unbelievably angry about the situation, the damage its doing to DS2 is unbelievable and so unnecessary. He and the other person involved in the incident were happily playing dominos on Thursday so she is hardly traumatised by it all....but DS2 is now massively traumatised! What a sh*t situation.

Update 2: well I finally managed to speak to the person who is 'dealing' with the incident and she was not prepared to give me any information...like 'how long will it take to resolve the situation?'...it looks as though we could be talking about months rather than weeks. I cannot begin to express how horrible the situation is. DS2 is beyond anxious and is stressing madly. This is pushing DD to her limits and she is in extreme amounts of pain and totally exhausted, this is so damaging to her and is likely to have a  permanent effect on her health. DP is being utterly disengaged from it all...quelle surprise! I had to tell him about it all as DS2 was not able to stop talking about it and even DP might notice that something was wrong when DS2 was off College for an extended period of time. I will be contacting the Police again on Monday...its Saturday now...hopefully they can speed up their game and get it sorted sooner rather than later...I am not sure how much longer DD or DS2 can cope with the stress!