It's been a really mild winter, virtually no ice or snow. Definitely my idea of a good winter! Still it's nice to have brighter mornings and less cold weather.
Grundo had to have his blood work done again in the New Year to check how his thyroid meds were doing. Getting his blood taken was fun...he'd struggled previously so I'd got him a tranquilliser so he wouldn't be as stressed. This worked the first time but the next time, even with a dose of happy pills he was fighting so hard two vets together and how ever many nurses were around couldn't get a blood sample so we'd got to take him back the following day so he could be sedated! For a blood test!! Anyway his thyroid levels came back low, and while the dosage could have been worked out it wasn't worth it as it was apparent that his kidneys, which had been giving odd readings for months, had given up the ghost. He had another few weeks for us to love and pamper him. He had chicken broth made...he loved it! He was particularly enthusiastic about the chicken skin which DD fried until it was very crispy.
By the end he was struggling to drink...I think it was just too much effort but he could still eat the chicken broth jelly. He spent all his time snuggled on the sofa being loved by DS1, DD or myself and was coping, though was starting to be in pain and his stomach was getting VERY sore. We got the vet to come to the house to euthanize him....given how stressed he was at the vets taking him there just seemed to be unnecessarily mean.
We miss him all the time, he was a lovely, gentle cat with a mass of love to share. He also had the most beautiful fur black with highlights of turquoise and red-bronze in the sun.
Our other cat Ruth is getting used to being able to roam and will follow DD downstairs but will mostly stay in the bedroom. She is still very skittish and nervous and very obviously loves DD with all her catty little heart and enjoys most snuggling her.
DD is having real problems with pain from her wisdom teeth. We eventually managed to get her to a dentist...she had been very reluctant to go as she was worried she'd be dismissed because she doesn't have enough energy to look after her teeth properly. Fortunately the dentist was really good, actually knew what M.E. is which is unusual and got her referred to get the teeth taken out under general anaesthetic. Hopefully it will all be sorted in another month or so.
Other than that she is still deteriorating and constantly having to cope with ever diminishing energy levels. It's so hard for her and she does struggle to stay out of major depression. She has taken up a new hobby of repainting dolls...it looks slightly macabre as she has various dismembered dolls on her desk as she's in the middle of working on them, and it obviously massively expensive, but she is enjoying it and is very good at what she does.
DS1 is slogging through his courses and is looking at some other courses that would be worth taking. He was starting to get depressed but seems to feel better now he has more of a plan and seems to be feeling happier. He is now insured on my car as a learner driver so we will be going out occasionally so he can practise between lessons.
DS2 has a plan for next year...he will stay with Swarthmore which is brilliant for him and also stay volunteering a Revive looking to increase the number of days he does and ultimately look at getting a job. A job will mess up his funding from St Anne's which is mostly benefits but I don't care, they can work all that out, Austin will love having a JOB and it will make him feel super grown up.
DM is still in the land of the living but is getting/ acting increasingly feeble. DP and I went over to Malton recently and she shuffles now instead of walking but I still have my money on her lasting out her century. DF is happily getting on his gardening and sorting other stuff he enjoys.
I am back to trying to sort my weight, after getting down to 12 stone my weight has drifted back up and I am now close to where I started. I really am not happy about it. I loved being 12 stone, I felt so good about myself and really felt I looked good. I am still getting myself new clothes when I need any and still liking myself so that didn't go away when I put the weight back on but I will like being slimmer again....mostly because DM will loath it!! After hating my weight most of the life...oh and how much I knew she hated it!....she no longer has anything approaching a 'figure' and she no longer feels stylish, so if I look good she will hate it. I am never supposed to be 'better' than her! (To be honest she hasn't been stylish in many years...I remember her dressing well in the 1970's but it was a bad period so the bar was set low...mostly she wears too many layers of mismatched brown clothes which looks crap on a short lumpy woman).
The news is all depressing, so much so I have been furiously avoiding all UK news and focusing on American news. It's still depressing but it's a long way away and I really struggle to understand it all which helps make it feel even less real. I have been haunting the justnomil thread on Reddit and some of the stories are just bizarre! It does prove however unpleasant and inadequate a parent my DM was/is she could have been worse. Not that that's much of a consolation really. She was still a shit mum.
